Sunday, March 7, 2010

Don't it make my brown eyes blue?

Let's face it: I have my dad's blue eyes. They are kind of squinty in the light, and small. I like the color, but I always was attracted to brown eyes. I wished I HAD brown eyes. Especially blond hair and brown eyes - I think that is a really nice combination. As much as I like that I look like Dad, I used to REALLY want to change my eyes to brown.

But I can't change the color of my eyes - they are light blue, small, and they are going to stay that way.

A friend of mine is rather short. She has to keep a stool in her kitchen to reach her top cabinets. She always has to hem her pantslegs, and when she gets in someone else's car, she has to adjust the seat forward in order to reach all the pedals. She would kind of like to be taller, and I don't think she ever appreciated the song, "Short people."
(I remind you this song is intended as satire.)

My sister-in-law dyes her hair a beautiful reddish color, and she, luckily gave birth to a red-headed son. This made everyone think that she's a REAL red-head, and she passes very well! She spends time and money in order to maintain this non-God-given hair color. She looks GREAT as a redhead. :)

What's my point? Some things you can't change, some things you might WANT to change, and you can make some things appear to change. But no one really thinks you can CHANGE the color of your eyes. Unless you wear contact lenses, you are stuck with the eye color you are born with.

My short friend gets along fine with her adjusted seat, step-stool, and hemmed pants. She is not looked upon as handicapped, nor is she left out of social groups because of her size - unless it's a basketball team that needs a tall player. She fits in at church, work, and as a respected citizen.

Meanwhile my sis-in-law LOOKS like a natural! My own daughter grew up not knowing that her aunt colors her hair regularly. She "passes." But naturally, her hair is not the color she presents.

With all three of these characteristics, please carry forward the analogy to what it means to be gay. Yes, one can cover up one's NATURAL sexual orientation, and APPEAR to be straight, but it's a continual cover-up. If my sis-in-law doesn't pay for the hair coloring, she would soon be "discovered." Her natural hair color would show, and we'd all know she was not really red-haired.

These three things (eye color, height, and color of hair) are examples of things you don't choose, that you are born with. Just like other characteristics that are "set," so it is with sexual orientation. Whether or not one is a "Kinsey 0" or a "Kinsey 6", it is only a description of a PART of each person, and it doesn't measure one's worth. There is no need to evaluate or judge someone based on their eye color, just like it there is no need to judge someone spiritually based on sexual orientation.

I can no more change my eyes to brown than my short friend can make herself taller! Thank goodness there's no song about how awful we blue-eyeds are!

(For some reason, blogger won't allow me to upload a close-up of my eyes. Just imagine them: blue, tiny, and with glasses.)

1 comment:

deb said...

Well said, Carol! (as always)

ps - I guess we always want what we don't have. I like blue eyes and blonde hair (and, I have neither).