To "anonymous" - the wife of the gay man, the one who keeps writing but has no name, even one to call you: Get your own blog. Sign up anonymously, don't have your real name or your real e-mail on it. It's not hard to do. Don't link to anything that will tell who you are.
I will not use my blog to let you say anything you want, especially that change is possible, or that accountability allows your husband to have "dealt with his sin ."
But I will state some things I want to put on my blog:
There are two viewpoints that are often combined into one. There is a theological viewpoint that you are taking, and it is that being gay is a sin. I disagree.
The other viewpoint is from science. Science does not provide a value on either hetero- or homosexuality. With that I agree.
Whether or not I agree with either of those viewpoints is not at issue here, but I state them to let there be no question of where I stand. I offer hope, and maybe some kindness here - NOT to say that I agree with your theological viewpoints, but to say that there are so many disagreements that I have no idea why you insist that I'm "deceived," "co-dependent," or that "I can see where you have to tell yourself this about other people who are coming from a different place because it is very very threatening to how you have explained this situation to yourself." You have plenty to say, but your messages are not, "a crumb of truth [that] will fall on hungry ears."
Lady - I am not angry with you, but I think you are the same dingbat that posted long diatribes on Pam Ferguson's blog some time back. (for information, there are two entries with long comments in March 08.) If you aren't the same, then you are the same type. I don't want to play nice, I just don't wish to play at all. Pam went out of her way to let you (or the person like you) post, but it was of no service to any of us, except to see how kind and good Pam is. While I know it would be a juicy argument, I'm not playing the game. Maybe I'm not good at it - I have never liked competition. Confrontation is something I'm not skittish of, but I always lost at dodgeball, and I'm not going to play now. Just get your own damn blog.